INGRATITUDE: Good Deed Gone Bad…part 2

ENGLAND 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 IN THE PARK…

We have put the incident of the bank and card behind us..Christmas came and went and we are good again…

Miss Perfect is supposed to leave end of January.. but somehow find a way to lingers a little longer… this puts a strain with she and her sister relationship …

My neighbor was ready to get her space back and get back to her normal routine without the inconvenience of entertaining Miss Perfect…

She loves sis..

But her company was becoming overbearing…and sis was starting to act her true self which irritates her….

Anyways moving along…

She needs funds to stay so her son wanted to send her some money…I have a PayPal account which I had received $ 150 through for her once before..

She asked if I could do it again for her.. without hesitation I told her yes…

Afterall its not costing me nothing to be of service ..

So he sent the another $ 150…

I saw the transaction but I noticed two things..

one: PayPal charges a fee of $6.90..

And…

Two: the balance is on hold..

I had no idea why these actions took place but I thought I would give PayPal some time to release the funds…

Of course I informed Miss Perfect of it all…

and we waited.. and waited… and waited..

She keeps on inquiring.. and I keep letting her know the status is still the same…

I was getting kinda curious as to why so After a week I decided to call PayPal and try to figure the reason for this hold and also why was I charged a fee..

I got an agent to talk after two tries.. and she explained to me that the transaction was done as a purchase..

Miss Perfect son obviously 🙄 uses PayPal as a way of buying things online and automatically sent me the money using that feature..

So I explain the situation and asked the agent how can we resolved the problem and get it off being held…

She advises me to tell the sender that he should go back in and hit ” The Receive button” as though he receives the product that he supposedly purchase… because the payment won’t be released until he received his item…

Okay.. understood… easy enough…

So I called Miss Perfect and explain to her what I had found out…

She said she would pass it along to her son…

Next morning bright and early she sent me a text of his PayPal account showing the money is available..

lo and behold ….

When I checked it was cleared .. so I immediately transferred it to my bank.. but it’s takes up to two days to reach my bank and clear..

I sent her a text telling her this.. she started to give me attitude and behaving again as if I’m cheating her out of her money..

The conversation goes like this…

I don’t know if Im overthinking or reading too much into this conversation but I’m personally sensing again some degree of ingratitude..

And it infuriates me that she is trying to make me feel bad for doing her this favor and for making me feel as if I’m the one guilty of putting a hold on this money… Or I am purposely withholding her funds…

And here she’s acting so dumb…. which I figured she actually is… with the knowledge of PayPal account and it’s functions..

I also get the feeling .. she thinks I’m so obligated to do it for her..

My first thought was to send the money back to her son… and let them find another way of getting it to her… But the kind person in me talk me out of it…

I know she is need of this funds.. so I will get it to her and forgot the whole thing…

But vow never say yes to any more of her requests…

I think I have learned a valuable lesson on ingratitude versus 🆚 kindness..

Sometimes a good deed goes bad…

but it’s still remains a good deed…

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INGRATITUDE: Good Deeds Gone Bad….

MY MY STORY

I’m friends with my neighbor for as long as I live on my block… We get together quite often almost daily some weeks.. and we share a lot about our lives …

Her eldest sister resides in Africa for over thirty years and she doesn’t get to see her very often..

Miss Perfect came for a two weeks visit which spiral into a four months stay..

My neighbor didn’t mind so much because she lives so far away and she thought that spending some quality time with Miss Perfect will be good..

Anyways..

Seeing that I spend so much time with her.. I became friends with Miss perfect… I liked her and I was fascinated with all her stories of Africa which she takes great pride in telling always making sure I know exactly how well off and how high class she is…

Not to mention only big wig executives she entertained.. and everyone else who is not in this class .. she does not associate with…

It didn’t bother me none.. because everyone has their preferences and has a right to their choice of living ..

And I was very proud of her that she has done so well for herself…

Well we started to have coffee ☕️ together when my neighbor is at work.. I like her company and like her conversations…

We became close enough I thought..that when she asked me the favor of using my credit card 💳 to pay for using a app online I willingly agreed…

She gave me the cash and I put the payment through…

Now a week later I noticed my card was billed for twice the amount we agreed on..

I overreacted and immediately call the bank to dispute the charges before I even spoke to her…

I call her and tell her what I saw and Also told her I disputed the charges with my bank..

She said she did not know why that happened but she realizes that she had two accounts..

The app was new to her and she didn’t quite understand how to work it.. I personally think she mistakenly summited another account but blatantly refused to admit that she made that error mistakenly…

I dropped the subject telling her that The bank will take care of the charges…the next week the bank spoke to me to let me know that my dispute is in process and will be investigated and they will let me know in time what will be decided..

The agent informed me that the charges may not be overturned..

Because it has been paid already..

I sent Miss Perfect a text to update her on what I found out.. and let her know that if they decided not to take it off she will be responsible for that extra charge plus all bank charges incurred…

Oooh maan…

She didn’t like that and she acted as if I was cheating her out of her money…

I told her I will just wait to see what the bank do before we continue with this discussion… she wasn’t at all pleased about me telling her that she is responsible for the charges on my card..

She acted so silly and naive about it all it makes me wonder about her intellectual level…

She claims to be so smart and experienced in so much because she has a doctorate in something…. and look at me like I’m the illiterate one…because I don’t happen to have a college degree in nothing…

I smile 😊… shake my head…

I knew better….

I sense some form of INGRATITUDE…

Why am I sensing ingratitude ..???!!

Instead of being grateful that I am willingly doing a service of good deed… for a person in need of my help??!!!!!

Instead of being grateful that Im willingly doing a service of a good deed…for a person in need of my help…

She becoming mean and acting as if I’m deceitful …

So I talked to my neighbor about it…it’s her sister anyways and I didn’t want to show my wrath when I actually agreed to this arrangement between us… and I didn’t want the hostility and tension..

My neighbor calmly advises me to just wait for the outcome because if the bank dispute the charges then everything will clear up..

I totally agreed..

And the bank did dispute it and she lost her account…

We put it behind us and try to maintain our relationship…

Now a month later..

she has asked another favor….

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TO BE CONTINUED….

See if I agree or not….

Grandma 👵 PRIDE JOY… Six Months..

SIX MONTHS… playing with her toys 🧸

********************

It’s so amazing as I watched her growing up in front of my eyes..

It’s as though I never experienced it before.. and as she learn new things..

Like rolling over.. sitting up.. humming to my songs and nursery rhymes… giggles when tickled…

It thrills me so…

You know I stuck with her more often than I care to sometimes..

And I fuss at my son and her mom for it..

She takes up most of my days and put me behind in everything else…she doesn’t sleep as much anymore.. and I’m very limited and I feel very restricted….

But.. when I have her.. I get so much joy… I find I enjoy taking care of her…

bonding with her and learning her little behaviors… she does have a little attitude already..

Like getting into a tantrum when she wants something like her bottle..

Or if she’s tired of being in one place too long..

It makes me smile 😊 ..to understand her moods and knowing why …

She’s sitting up and trying her darnest to crawl… and she gets so frustrated when she can’t move forward..that she just lie on her tummy and fuss and then roll on her back and over again on tummy gets on her knees and bounces back and forth…before giving up…

I watched her and just laugh and asked her what you doing baby girl..

And it touches me so when she looks at me and smile so brightly…

I feel so lucky to have her with me this close.. and although I get annoyed sometimes with her parents for giving me full responsibility …

I do love the chance of seeing her growing daily and watching her every step of development…

It just gives a great sense of pride…

SHE’S DEFINITELY GRANDMA’S PRIDE AND JOY…..

FREELOADERS: MISS TING

….. I was quite upset with the fact that she didn’t give me that money .. especially when I had to find another way of funding for this outstanding bill…

I tried to stay calm but my emotions was very obvious.. and everything started to bother me…

I became very bitchy… and very grumpy…

My son was becoming the target of my gripes because I know If I had to address her personality I couldn’t and wouldn’t be nice…

One evening my son came out and was joking about things of the past and I was very amused at first and played along with him until he touched that very sensitive subject…

It sparks that fire that was building in me and I completely exploded..

I got so loud and I went off angrily…

and I repeated myself about the money she refuses to give..

But…

can go tanning and eat out everyday..

And yet she claims she can’t afford to pay me what’s I’m due….

Like the water and electricity she uses run on air.. or like I don’t have to pay a mortgage for this house monthly..

Like how she come. Living in here scotch free .. freeloading her ass on everything that I paid for to own…

Acting like she’s entitled and like I owes her freeloading ass a living…

Leaving trails of mess behind her for me to clean up like I’m the maid in my own house…

And when I asked for the bare minimum to help me with all she extra bills she racked up..

I’m mean and nasty and money hungry…

I said all that and more…

my son quickly went to his room.. knowing that…. from experience… when I reached this point of fury.. there is no calming me..

And that I will say everything and more until I feel satisfied…

I stopped and went to my room.. so angry.. that i wanted to run away from it all…

I woke up next day.. still not too happy.. but a little calmer…

Over the next few days I became silent trying to regain my sweet composure…

Until…..

Her birthday was on the 10th…

On the day in question , my son came to me asking if I could watch the baby because they want to go out to celebrate,,,

I refused.. thinking … pleasingly that I would get back at her some and she would have to stay home with baby…

Haha 😆

The joke was on me…

A couple hours later Abraham came with baby asking me to play with her a little..

I told him to let miss Ting deal with her baby today…

There he informs me that she went out with her friends to celebrate..

MISS TING… actually thinks her birthday was so much more important than staying with her baby..

I chuckled.. in disbelief.. and I look at my son and shake my head… telling him that he really is enabling her and spoiling her ass..

I took my granddaughter and I played with her and was convinced that MISS TING is clearly not responsible enough to be a mother…

I see and realized that I have to assist my son with her until she gets older…

But it left a gnawing feelings in my gut that I am stuck with MISS TING… and god knows I really don’t know how I am going to tolerate her for much longer…

I will have to sacrifice my son and my granddaughter and lose both.. which creates great anxieties in me thinking… can I!!!????

We’ll just have to wait and see… and pray for an answer to this dilemma…

**********^^^^^******

TO BE CONTINUED…..

FREELOADERS: MISS TING…

Why does these individuals think they are entitled or thinks everyone owes them a living….

I’m dealing with a bad case of freeloading… and I’m kinda backed in a corner of wall and hard place…

let’s call her Miss Ting….

******^^^^*****

Miss Ting came in life and my home when my son decided that he’s in love with her and bring her back home to Florida with him from Montana….

I welcome her and invited her in my home…

I told my son I’m going to charge her and him to stay here… he wasn’t quite pleased.. firstly he said he will pay me everything I asked…

I told him no way…

She’s not going to live here for free…

So they both started to work and at first they give me what I asked…she was here for nine months and got pregnant…

But I have big issues with her housekeeping..

she don’t…

she created more mess than anything and don’t clean up .. the rooms they occupied was becoming a huge pile of trash and filth..

I’m under the impression that she doesn’t know how to clean and that mess is her norm…

I complain .. I grumbled… I asked..

And my son has to be the one to get it in order everytime..

Let me not mention the bathroom… because I ended up having to clean it up every time…

I was getting really Annoyed and agitated with her and this mess she created…

But.. I tried to not say much to her because she shuts me out.. very non responsive.. and I didn’t want to ask her to leave because my son seems very much in love 🥰 with her…

Miss Ting has access to all my appliances..

All my pots and pans..

All my plates, cups…utensils…

Everything in the house is all mine

and I pay a monthly mortgage ..

The soap she washes her clothes with.. in my washing machine and dryer… I buy..

Toilet paper.. toothpaste…towels.. sheets..

I supplied…

And she comes and she uses without reservation..or guilt…

She was giving me what I requested so I did not mind so much..

I was happy and tried to ignore her mess.. until she went back home to West Virginia.. to her mommy and daddy to have her baby,..

My son went with her…

I had mixed feelings about him leaving..

I was glad to see her go but I missed my son and I feared him not coming back home..

They stayed away four months and I prayed that he come back home…

( But Sometimes you have to be very careful with what you pray for… because god answers prayers..

and you might just get what you pray for..)

So they return with baby…in September…

She immediately went back to work…

My son’s car wasn’t working so he decided to wait a while before going back to work…

and help me along with getting used to the baby…and getting his car in working condition…

Okay.. September rolls off and I let it go without mentioning I need some payments for extra expenses..

Come October I decided to mention to her that our previous arrangements is still in effect and I need that money by the end of the month….

After some debate about not knowing or thinking she was still responsible for giving me that money..

….and me reminding her of all the extra utilities and stuff she’s racking up.. we decided on November 1st…which was a definite date…

With Abraham not working and unable to play his part of contributions I was counting on her money to cover an outstanding bill..

I leave it at that.. and I struggled with her mess and her neglect of her baby all month…

I ended up washing and sterilizing the baby bottles… every day..

I took responsibility of washing the baby’s clothes…

She doesn’t.. so I do it…

And I find myself ending up with baby even when she’s home.. so I refuse to be responsible for the baby whenever she’s off…

But.. my son ended up with the responsibility… it irritates and annoys me…and I try to keep out of their personal affairs until it starts to affects me.. whereas I’m expected to keep her while they goes out..

I then become belligerent …

And so they realize I was not happy with their attitude…

So now with all that happening during the month of October…. come November the first.. I reminded her by text of our agreement….

She has the nerves to let me know that she won’t be able to pay me with a long list of excuses and reasons..

I plainly tell her that all her reasons is none of my concern and that I need my money today…

We went back and forth for five minutes with me telling and reminding her of all that she’s been using up and what it’s been costing and that nothing is free..

Of course I still came out the loser..and I was mad 😡 and furious…

I want her out of my house but my son and his baby prevented me from asking her to leave..

I know if she goes so does the baby and I didn’t want to put Abraham through that emotional pain…

So miss Ting is getting a free pass because of my son and his baby…

I am not in the least happy with her at all…

I am thinking and thinking of ways to get around this situation that I find myself in..

I’m really confused..

unsure…

Disturbed..

Apprehensive

Perturbed …. ect.. ect..

***********************

TO BE CONTINUED….

A GRANDMA’S 👵 JOY & PRIDE….

GRANDMA BABY GIRL 👧
MY BABY WITH HIS BABY GIRL 👧

Nothing warms the heart ❤️ of a mom like having a grandbaby…..

It’s like having your baby all over again.. and you compare and reflect on all the similarities of when your baby was that age..

You relive all those moments of having him all over again.. and it takes you back to those precious memories of raising him..

To have his baby in your arms.. seeing his face on her.. and realizing all of sudden that your baby has become a man having children of his own…

And this precious little angel makes you want to squeeze her so tight.. and fill you with her much pride and give you this profound joy that fills your heart with warmth..

I’m a second time grandma..

but this is my first girl 👧 .. I have had two sons and three grandsons… and now a granddaughter…

THE GRANDSONS….12; 10; & 6

My three little men… they keep me smiling and keep me in line… gives my life meaning and make it all worthwhile..

I love spending time with them.. they tire me out but the pleasure I get is all worth it…

And now In addition to my little princes …. come my little princess..

I think this is what makes life so wonderful.. the simple pleasures of children..

You get to feel responsible for someone and you get to think of someone else’s happiness other than your own ..

So you do everything in your power to make them happy and keep them smiling….

And you find yourself smiling too because they are…

What could be more filling than that…

What could be more satisfying???!!!…

It’s so wonderful when you live long enough to see your babies become adults and having a family of their own…

And even better when you are apart of their lives……you get to bond with your grandbabies….

Definitely A Grandma’s pride and joy…..

HOME: WHERE WE BELONG….

Isn’t it very strange how far life taken us sometimes away from the home we were born and grown and know as home most of our lives..

And then we found a place called home.. and we feel so belong and very comfortable.. that we doesn’t even miss our parents home anymore..

I’m a Jamaican.. and I love Jamaica.. and I get so home sick sometimes..

I got the chance to come to the USA 23 years ago.. I landed in Florida in a city called Hollywood… I spent the first year in that city..

I had a aunt in ORLANDO and she had invited me to come for a visit..and I accepted..

I was so intrigued With Orlando and feel in love in the city.. I promise myself I would come back and make it my home…

It was so beautiful and clean…

I liked HOLLYWOOD.. and would have stayed because I found the love of my life whom I was very much in love with… and I enrolled in school to pursued my advanced accounting career…

I was living in another aunts home (they were my father sisters)…and just after Christmas she told me she sold it and I had to find somewhere else to live..

My aunt in Orlando has suggested that I come stay with her and I had refused due to school and my lover… but fate has stepped in for me to fulfill my promise to make Orlando my home…

with no where to go I decided to take up my aunts in Orlando offer..

I had to arranged a location transfer from my job..make arrangements to to Orlando.. I was crushed to leave my love behind.. and was very disappointed to quit school…

But….

I was very excited to live in the city I fell in love with…

I had two boys.. age 10. And 2.. that I left behind in Jamaica… I took the baby with me when I came here…but had to take him back home when I couldn’t afford to Keep him.. and work At the same time…

I intended to find a school in Orlando to continued my accounting career… as soon as I got settled…

…..but I went back home to see my babies that May..and I didn’t like what I saw. Especially my baby…

My beautiful healthy baby was now puny.. and obviously wasn’t taken care of properly..

I was so tempted to stay home with him.. but knew I couldn’t take care of him in Jamaica…

So I came back to Orlando.. in tears..and anguish and was determined to find me a home so I could get him with me…

I started a second job… to try earned enough money to make it happen..

My aunt was a real estate agent..and I complained and confided in her about wanting my baby with me..

She promised to help me buy a home.. and a year later she lives up to her promise and got me approved for my home..

I was so elated.. I close this house in September 1998.. get it all ready and went for my baby..

He was going on four.. and when I brought him to this house.. he acted like he was home…

my oldest son join me six years later…

It so happens I lived next to a elementary school.. and it also happens that one of my neighbors was his aunt from his father’s relatives..

She has two children his age group.. and we became very close and became friends..

I happen to choose the right time to move into that neighborhood.. most of my neighbors had young children.. and they all became friends with my baby boy.. and they all helped me to baby sit him in time of need..

I still worked two jobs..and with my baby as well .. I couldn’t fit school in my schedule….

I worked from 11pm at night.. to 2pm the next day…five days a week.. and I took my baby up at 2:30 pm…

spent the evening cooking.. cleaning.. and make sure he’s all set for the night…

and then sleep for about 4 hrs… and do it all over again…

I actually had this routine for next fifteen years…

so I sometimes needed to have someone to baby sit him for me.. and all my neighbors chipped in..

So he grows up here.. and after 20 years..we became attached to the neighborhood.. we made many memories here.. and so it’s home..

Jamaica is no longer home to me.. yesss.. I still love Jamaica with all the fund memories of growing up.. and the bad too..

I will always go back to visit but Orlando is where I called home now….

I look back and sometimes marvel as to where life has taken me.. and I’m really grateful for the opportunity I got to find a home in Orlando…

My baby boy is now grown and moved away to a different state.. and I missed him so much and hoped he would return.. the house is so empty without him and his brother..

But…

I understand life does take us in different directions and places..and I have accepted that his home may no longer be my home…

My oldest is also married and still lives in Florida.. but in a different city.. a hour away from me..

Home…. we never knew where we may end up.. how far away we may go or where life may take us.. but we all find that place we call home….

So you teach your kids to spread their wings.. explore other places.. until they find that one place that makes them feel like they are home….

HOME: THE PLACE WHERE WE BELONG….